The Life You Save May Be Your Own

DID, knitting, sci-fi, and strong opinions

I want to cut (Amanda) September 1, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — weordmyndum @ 12:25 am
Tags: , ,

I feel like shit and I want to cut. If I wasn’t afraid I’d get in trouble if our team found out, I’d already have done it.

None of those BS healthy coping skills do anything at all. Believe me, I’ve tried them all already. The only one that kinda helps is punching the wall because it hurts my hand but I probably shouldn’t mess up the wall. Cutting works better anyways.

I just wanna stop feeling and I don’t get why I’m not supposed to do it. It’s not like it hurts anybody else. I know it’s just a temporary fix and I’m okay with that. I’d rather do something instead of just moping around whining about how shitty we feel which is all we’ve been doing so far. Why’s it so bad for me to do the one thing I can that’ll make me feel better?

Amanda

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3 Responses to “I want to cut (Amanda)”

  1. brandic32 Says:

    I’m sorry you feel so shitty :(. I know it can be so hard sometimes. Please feel free to punch me if this idea is shit and you’ve tried it, but have you tried taking a cold shower? I too hate all the bullshit coping mechanisms therapists tout because none of them work for me either. Until my therapist told me to try taking a cold shower when I’m feeling overwhelmed by things. And it has miraculously worked for me.

    I’m sorry you are struggling, I really am. Feel free to email me at any time if you want/need to. I’m thinking about you and hope you get through this sooner rather than later.

  2. Ellen Says:

    I don’t know how to help but I’m here listening. Would getting angry at the people who hurt you be possible, instead of turning it on yourself?


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