The Life You Save May Be Your Own

DID, knitting, sci-fi, and strong opinions

At the end, Captain, we all stand alone June 24, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — weordmyndum @ 10:37 pm
Tags: ,

I feel pretty crappy right now.

 

It was the dream.  I’ve been off all day because of it, and I feel hella stupid for being this upset about it.  It’s just a dream.  I’ve had a lot that were way worse than this, so why can I not just get the hell over it?

 

I’ve been starting knitting projects and ripping them out all day, not because I messed up the pattern but because I just hate everything that I make.  It’s never good enough.  It’s never right.  This is a thing I do when I get upset.

 

I’ve been in tears off and on all day.  I know probably a lot of this is hormonal (mine have been even weirder than normal this month), but it doesn’t make it feel any less real.  I just feel so alone.  I want somebody to hug me and sit with me and make me feel better, but there’s no one.  I mean, I could probably call someone on my team and ask them to come, but it’s not anywhere close to an emergency.  Plus, it’s kind of pathetic that I have to pay people to get them to care and be there for me.

 

I’m really grateful for my internet friends, I am.  But sometimes I just want someone to be emotionally AND physically present.

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3 Responses to “At the end, Captain, we all stand alone”

  1. Bourbon Says:

    I’m
    Sorry you feel so alone 😦

  2. I understand. Sometimes I also wish I had someone physically present. I wish we could apparate so we could support each other in real life.

  3. twirlinggirl Says:

    I know the feeling… and internet friends, though great, don’t fill that hole. I hope (and believe) this hard moment will pass. Sending love and care. xoxo


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