The Life You Save May Be Your Own

DID, knitting, sci-fi, and strong opinions

Extremely Triggered (Alison) March 2, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — weordmyndum @ 5:45 pm

We’re very, very triggered ATM.  Kate and this guy from our treatment team were having this conversation about cultural relativism.  (Well, he didn’t know he was talking to Kate instead of Sara, but whatever.)  It was all fine until he started talking about some ritual coming-of-age thing from somewhere that involved a girl getting raped and killed in a really horrible way.  And he was saying it was okay because it was an honor to be the girl chosen in their culture or something.  He asked if the conversation was freaking us out or anything, and Kate told him no, it’s fine.  But it wasn’t fine.
We don’t have a history of RA as far as anyone in this sub-system knows, but I feel sick.  He was talking about it, him and Kate, and maybe she didn’t know anything was wrong, but I could feel our heart pounding and hands shaking and head spinning.  Now I’m fighting really hard just to stay in control.  I can tell it’s really bad, and our sub-system wheel thing is trying to turn so a whole different subsystem can take over, but I’m trying to keep that from happening.  I’m just not sure how long I can fight it for.


3 Responses to “Extremely Triggered (Alison)”

  1. Grainne Says:

    I wish I could help. Try to be very gentle with yourself and do what you need to do to stay in control. Know I’m here with you, at least. xx

  2. ((((((((Arms around you.))))))))))

  3. ligeandcrew Says:

    That would have triggered us too. I don’t think it’s at all necessary to have experienced RA, to be triggered by that kind of extreme violence.

    Wish there was something we could do. (((Hugs)))

    We too often don’t realize when we’re becoming triggered, until it’s too late. And then there’s that automatic don’t-be-rude thing….

    So sorry this happened to you. Sending wishes for comfort, and that the triggered state be brief.

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